Community

Today at church our pastor gave a sermon on community. He talked about how the people in your life can make or break who you are. He used the bible verse Proverbs 13:20 as a reference which says:

Walk with the wise and become wise,
for a companion of fools suffers harm.

Well as great as that verse is, the footnotes in my bible made it mean so much more. They said:

"The old saying "A rotten apple spoiles the barrel" is often applied to friendships, and with good reason. Our friends and associates affect us, sometimes profoundly. Be careful whom you choose as your closest friends. Spend time with people you want to be like -- because you and your friends will surely grow to resemble eachother"

 

This really hit me hard. You see I have a couple close friends here in Texas, and they are all about to leave (the joys of living near a military base). In preparation for this change, I have been trying to put myself out there so I can make new friends. I have been very specific at where I look for these friends. I joined a La Leche League (LLL) Facebook Group for a local group, and went to one of their meetings. I met a very nice woman through them that I am very much enjoying getting to know. I have also been in contact with a Cloth Diapering group that meets once a month for play group, but haven't been able to meet with them yet. But other than that its been church related places. Small Groups or our church Facebook page, play groups, etc.

 

It is very important to me that the friends I bring into my life are good Christian women. For the exact reason stated in that quote "Spend time with people you want to be like....[you] will surely grow to resemble eachother."

 

I have spent so much time over the past 3 years becoming a person that I can be fairly proud of, and I do not want to throw that away now by choosing the wrong company. I know how much people can affect your thinking and decisions. As a mother, wife and especially a Christian, I have to stand up for what I believe in. And I need others who will help.

 

Now don't get me wrong, I definitely do not think that means that I can only hang out with or be friends with "perfect" Christian people. Jesus himself hung out with the worst of sinners. I just think that my closest friends, the people I count on, the people I turn to in times of need, know the Lord. And in the meantime, I reach out to those who may not know the Lord, or who may need love and I show it to them. Having a good backing of friends and spiritual strength will certainly help that.

Day 1 -- 15 facts about me

1. Thankful for my heavenly Father and Chuck, because without them, I would be an orphan by more than just official definition.

2. I used to live by the philosophy "I will try anything once" but that didn't work out so well, now I live by, "I will do anything to glorify God".  

3. There are days I talk to my sister on the phone for hours (literally), and when asked what we talked about, I would have no answer.

4. I read my bible everyday. I began this habit in 2010, and had some breaks in 2011 (that was a rough year for me) but have no missed a day since last August. It is amazing how much you learn and grow when you are determined to read God's word daily.

5. My mom always cooked "with a pinch of this" or "a splash of that", never having measurements. I can say that I have become that type of a cook too. My chili recipe (and others) is never the same twice.

6. I am incredibly self conscious. I gained nearly 80 pounds when pregnant with Ethan, and have lost 40 pounds so far, but I have a hard time looking in the mirror at times.

7. I lived in Europe for nearly 6 years, and traveled and saw a ot of things, but I have never been happier than I am now.

8. I met my husband at Lowe's (where we both worked at the times) and my first impression of him was that it was creepy how he always smiled at me.

9. Charlie and I got married in Las Vegas a mere 3 1/2 months after we started dating. Have never second guessed it, and never looked back. I got me a good man, and I am happy.

10. I will forgive anyone who wrongs me, no matter what they did. Because I know the cost of forgiveness. It has been held from me, when I was truly sorry, and I have been forgiven for my many wrongs. Not to mention, if Christ can forgive a sinner like me, who am I to withhold forgiveness from you. But don't take me generosity lightly, just because I forgave you, doesn't mean I will allow you to continue hurting me. Jesus says to forgive 7 x 77 times, but he doesn't say I have to keep allowing you in my life if all you are going to do is hurt me.

11. Ethan is 4 1/2 months old, we are still breastfeeding strong (and we will be breastfeeding until he is 1 or he self weans...we haven't decided), we cloth diaper, we left him intact, and once in a while we even co-sleep. He's my first baby, and I don't know how to do everything right, so we are just doing things how we feel best. And this works for us, and we are happy.

12. I am one of the cheapest people you will meet. I am always looking for a good deal, always willing to accept something for free. Goodwill and Craigslist are very good friends of mine.

13.  I love to read, but I get lazy. I waste so much time on the computer and will go months without picking up a book.

14. I love inside jokes. I love knowing things that no one else knows. I love laughing at something that no one around gets, and even if I tried to explain it, it would not do justice.

15. I want to be the best I can be, for God, Charlie, and Ethan so I am always trying to improve for them, and not be stuck in a rut.

A friend loves at all times

What is a friend? Who are your friends? What makes someone a friend? This seems like such simple questions, but then I really started to think about it. My definition to my husband of what a friend is, is someone I know aspects of their day to day life. But then I realized that many of the people I consider friends, I have not spoken to in weeks (or longer). And that really got me thinking...what exactly is a friend?

Webster Dictionary defines it as "one attached to another by affection or esteem" or "a favored companion". Well I guess with that definition I have many friends.

Facebook defines friends as someone who can read your facebook posts and can see your pictures. And who knows the last time I spoke to some of my facebook "friends".

My dictionary would be more specific. A friend to me is someone who I can turn to and know they will have my back. A friend is someone I call for support, when I am bored, for prayer. A friend is someone I would make a special trip to see if I am driving through your town (I have many "out of town" friends). With my definition, I have much fewer friends.

But with my first definition I told my husband, "someone who knows (or I know) aspects of their day to day life", I have maybe two friends.

I am fine with my friend situation though. The people I call friends, I love and depend on. So whats the point of this post? The bible's definition of a friend is found in Proverbs 17 verse 17, "A friend loves at all times". So with that definiton I think I would encourage you to look at your "friends" and who do you have that "loves at all times" and who do you "love at all times".

What does it mean to "love at all times"?

I believe that means to forgive at all costs, never abandon, there when you need to talk. And I can only think of a handful of people that fall into this catagory on a daily basis. Look at yourself this week, and examine how good of a friend you are and what definition of a friend are you using?